A Manager’s Val(YOU) +

This is related to the previous post in this category in some way. If you have reached that stage in your career, where you are preparing the content of presentations to be made to external teams/senior management, you would know what I am talking about. The mandate that one starts with is to make a presentation that brings out your work and puts your views across, while we engage in a dialogue with ‘them’ to further our efforts into real action. Then you spend countless hours regurgitating facts, grinding theories, crucifying opinions, posing mind benders, culling out the solution, and posing actionables. If one had spent 3-4 weeks in working through the idea before it germinated into something worthy of showcasing at the higher level, another 3-4 days is spent in putting this ‘adorable’ ppt (Hail Microsoft) together. After all this, what catches the eye of your manager when she/he wants to ‘value-add’ to your work?
-Isnt that font a little too small or archaic to be shown on a bigger canvas
-How about replacing that mundane round bullet, with a flashy square blue button with a hole.
-Why are there very few slides in the Appendix? Did we not do more than this?
-Great and easy to understand process flow diagram – but do not demystify everything we do.
-Arent the colours a little too bright for the late evening presentation that we want to have?

(The Slide Master used was the same as the one used by the Manager, centuries ago(OSO style))

Deliverable – Urgent: Before 00:00 hours today

If you are a manager, then you would know this trick by now. Several times, circumstances demand that you get meaningless work done out of your team. Not all the work you do, is going to find some use somewhere. There are also times when there is absolutely no work at all. What does one do in such times, one can’t let the team rust away..one can’t let the team harbor ugly thoughts that can hurt the organization in the long run( like wanting to move to seemingly greener pastures)…so keep them busy with work that may or may not see the light of the day.

One is subject to this misery more often when one is a junior level team member..but then it is bliss at that point of time as very few people understand the difference between work and ‘real’ work at this point.

The next level of misery is when you are a reasonably senior member in the team and is privy to the real deliverables that affect the team. Here the situation gets tricky, as by now, one knows that the work given is just a tactic used by the manager, but a skilful manager can mask it under the shroud of secrecy or how important it is to lead to a bigger better project in the coming few months.

But the best is when the same treatment is meted out to your managers; they end up working late for a supposed meeting and it then gets cancelled at the last minute..whoa, what pleasure!

Grand Old Losers

Have you ever played a game with an elder? They are the worst losers. They come up with the most inventive of reasons when they lose over a game – and it is not restricted to outdoor games, where one may still leave it to the charms of old age..but even over carom, or cards, or chess; these reasons may range from “you cheated”or “I was occupied with something else” (as though he/she was atlas shrugged), “I let you win a game lest u whine” to the bizarre “nobody wins in life by winning a game of chess”!!
(Inspired by the cell phone ad on tv where the grandson and granddad are holed up in the 64 squares )

Some shitty questions*…

1. Can birds ‘drop’(refer the post headline again ) when flying? All of us have at some point or the other seen bird droppings’ on our cars even when parked in open space.
2. Why is it that when we travel in groups with guy friends, that when one of them has the urge to relieve himself, other male friends fall in line too? Haven’t seen the same of my friends of the other sex though. They however choose the most inconvenient of times for the same.
3. When ‘dissecting’ chicken/pork for preparing meals, where does the last meal that the poor animal has had disappear? (Me a veggie…tg for that )
4. When people fart, why do they follow it with the strangest of expressions on their faces even when there is no decibel disturbance, while everybody else clutches their nose?
5. Are people enamoured by the medicinal value of a bull’s shit, that BULL SHIT is a more widely used epithet? (Thank God, bulls cant fly …grinnn….for the low recall capacity readers of this post, refer post point number 1)

*Please do not take personal offence on any of the above questions. They are observations of general nature, and not with the intent to ridicule or put anybody in more discomfiture than they already are in )

So fa(r), So long

Long since I posted. Not that I have not been writing, but have generally been busy (read lazy) to log in, write, edit and the like. Will make up for my disappearance with some randomly insane thoughts in the next few quick posts.